Turning Stress into Success: How Product Managers Can Overcome Workplace Challenges

A 2023 study by Asana found that 88% of product managers feel stressed often or all the time. Top that off with..

• A 2022 Product School survey found that 45% of product managers felt their team lacked the necessary skills or experience (report behind paywall)

• A 2020 survey by Amplitude reported that 44% of product managers struggle with building and maintaining high-performing teams. 

Basically we’re a pretty stressed out bunch and getting more stressed every year.  I’m here to tell you, you can turn stress into success.

First let’s revisit ‘microstresses’

You may have read the newsletter last year where I introduced microstresses. They are small niggles which cause you to cringe before moving on. When multiple microstresses add up, they can sap energy, damage physical and emotional health, and negatively impact overall well-being. Fortunately there are ways to fight back.

Often small stressful events fly under the radar, because they do not trigger the same response mechanisms that more obvious stress generates.

I’m bringing up the topic of stress again as I’ve seen so many people - including myself - return to work refreshed. Time off over the holidays provided the opportunity to reset. Then more tech layoffs were announced and performance reviews kicked in, all leading to stress levels creeping back up. I wanted to keep the microstresses at bay and revisited the prior post.

Have you found yourself in a similar frame of mind? Wanting to be more mindful of your wellbeing during 2024, then finding yourself immediately facing some or all of the following stress inducing scenarios since 2024 began.

1. Constant Interruptions: Frequent interruptions from emails, messages, and ad-hoc meetings

2. Shifting Priorities: Changes in company priorities and ambiguous objectives

3. Cross Functional Stakeholder Requests: Conflicting expectations and demands from stakeholders

4. Lack of Clarity: Vague communication and requests without context leading to misunderstandings, confusion, and wasted time.

5. Deadline Pressure: Tight project timelines and unforeseen gotchas introducing delays alongside additional pressure

If you’re a product leader, tack on these additional stress inducers:

1. Decision-Making: Needing to make important decisions, often with limited information and uncertain outcomes

2. Sharing Feedback: Coaching team members through positive and negative scenarios

3. Team Culture: Balancing team dynamics and ensuring everyone is aligned, motivated and collaborating

4. Work-Life Balance: Juggling your own work + personal schedule plus that of your team members, especially when executives send messages after hours

Here are steps I am taking to help manage my own microstress. Yes, some fall under the ‘practice what I write about’ scenario.

• Build in buffer time. Do your best to not work all the time. If you can, block out Friday afternoon and Monday morning to catch up and prepare for the week. I also try for focus time at the end of each work day to review documents and prepare for meetings instead of working late.

• Practice ‘do not schedule’. Companies often have a time or day where meetings are not supposed to occur… which is subsequently ignored. Reintroduce the practice and support your team to say ‘no’ when meetings are scheduled. Watch as other teams get on board as well.

• Wind down at the end of the day. I would work into the evening and then go straight to bed, only to keep thinking about work. Now I go to bed 30 minutes earlier and read. The transition helps me to unwind, focus my mind elsewhere and subsequently go to sleep.

• Revisit the practices from last year:

  • Be attuned to the microstress you are causing others. Snap at someone; they inevitably snap back. When we put our stress onto others, it bounces back on us too. Putting out less stress means we receive less too.

  • Rise above. Recall the bigger picture. For example, acknowledge and move past small annoyances. Take a breathe, reset, and focus on the meaning behind your work (and life) to create a better frame of mind.

  • And the slightly controversial recommendation, learn how to say “no” (politely) to small asks. Put off immediately responding to notifications or interruptions which are likely to stress you out.

Now let’s put these approaches into practice, so they remain top of mind. 

You can instigate change

You’ve started to take steps to remove the micro stresses. I wish I could tell you it’s time to sit back and enjoy a moment of zen.  Not just yet. NOBL has a catchier way of conveying the actual status - make noise, not make do.

When you have created an environment where people feel they can bring forward obstacles preventing progress and leading to stress, some employees might take your invitation too far and simply complain or act in an unprofessional manner. 

Be clear, the goal is to not introduce more stress or go it alone. Instead bring your team together to discuss the remaining pain points. Such an exercise is called “Elephants, Dead Fish, and Vomit” and originates from Airbnb.

1. List the elephants in the room. Capture the big issues that no one likes to talk about. 

2. List the dead fish. Record the lingering issues or resentment that no matter what the cause, need to be addressed or people will continue to focus on the past.

3. Identify what needs to be vomited out. Get out all those individual frustrations which just need to be voiced.

4. Assess next steps. Identify how to divide up the next steps to provide a sense of closure and enable the team to move on. 

5. Decide what not to share. Acknowledge not everything needs to go broader. For example if your team is concerned about change, help them to see the old path will actually result in loss - to customers, the business, and to themselves.

Change is hard. Encourage your team to participate instead of pushing back. Remind them that continuing to rely on the old, stressful ways of working while the world moves on, is likely to be even more discouraging and isolating.

Still seeing your team on the side of stress not success? Margaret Mead famously said:

In a 2018 study at the University of Pennsylvania, Professor Damon Centola conducted experiments with online communities to determine the threshold for cultural change. He found that when at least 25% of the community members formed a "committed minority group" advocating for a shift in norms, change became inevitable.

One asterisk in the experiment – the change actually began with ONE person in the group. So how do you go from one person to a 25% committed minority? 

• Step One: What’s awesome about the 25% result in the University of Philadelphia work, is that the change started with one person. ONE. So, while you might need 25%, you start with one voice - it could be yours! 

• Step Two: How do you go from 1 person to 25%?  The study found the point of growth was 3.5%.  You needed to have 3.5% of people actively engaged in the change and displaying sustained involvement.

• Step Three: Work with the 3.5% to introduce true change through collaborative methods such as design thinking, co-creation, and appreciative inquiry to create a shared sense of purpose.

Change achieved through force (you must do this) is often rejected and only successful in 10% of cases. Creating a sense of urgency can backfire too, as it often reflects the belief that without constant haste, you're already falling behind. The panicked, frantic pace values action over results and has consequences. People take shortcuts, they don’t have time to be creative - and guess what, they get stressed.  

Guess what, the collaborative - purpose driven - method is generally effective 70% of the time. To go from 1% to 3.5% an exercise I like to do is from Coda and is called “Is your team laying bricks or building a cathedral”? I prefer to say “Is your team planting seeds or cultivating a garden”.  

Turn stress into success

Each member of the team understands how their work contributes to something that is larger, more substantial, and more ambitious than their individual activity. If you’re planting seeds, that’s wonderful. It’s likely something will bloom.  If the team works together and considers their teammates, their individual seeds can grow into a work of art. 

Building on the answers, you can get a sense of how much alignment - or lack thereof - you have to build upon. Added bonus, it’s likely you’ll have identified the people who will make up your 3.5%!  

• Step Four: Once you have the 3.5% supportive through collaborative methods, empower them. For example, together create an artifact that defines the desired future state.  You could fill out a vision board or draft a PRFAQ. Another option is to follow Marty Cagan and write a letter to the CEO coming from the viewpoint of a thankful customer. Have members of the 3.5% talk through the artifact(s). As they do so, a picture of the garden will begin to form - one team members can start to rally behind. 

• Step Five: After sharing the artifact(s), to nudge the 3.5% to 25%, ask another question. “What’s your role in creating the change our team is trying to drive?”  Based on the responses, identify those most aligned with the envisioned future.  Co-create with them to define a future which brings the 25% tipping point within your reach. 

Here are two exercises to help identify commitment to change. You can use FigJam or another collaborative tool:

1. Anonymously Share Concerns and Ideas: Create a virtual board with two sections - one for "Concerns" and another for "Ideas." Have team members anonymously post their concerns related to communication, work environment, or psychological safety on virtual sticky notes in the "Concerns" section. Similarly, ask them to post their ideas for improvement in the "Ideas" section. This exercise allows team members to express themselves freely, providing valuable insights into areas that may need attention.

2. Circle of Trust Mapping: Draw a large circle in the center of the canvas and label it "Circle of Trust." Ask team members to individually place their avatars or icons inside the circle if they feel a high level of trust and psychological safety within the team. Alternatively, they can place their avatars outside the circle if they feel less safe. This visual representation helps the team see the overall perception of trust and safety within the group. Afterward, have an open discussion about the placements and identify actions to enhance trust and safety for everyone.

An alternative is to use Zoom. Here are two exercises to help your team open up and share any stress they are facing:

1. Safety Check-In: Ask team members to use the chat to express how stressed they feel on a scale from 1 to 5, with 1 indicating low stress and 5 indicating high stress. Encourage them to provide a brief explanation if they wish. This exercise provides a quick snapshot of the team's stress level and can serve as a starting point for discussions on how to improve it.

2. Anonymous Polls: During a conference or virtual meeting, ask participants to use Zoom's polling feature to provide anonymous feedback. Pose open-ended questions such as "What can we do to improve communication within the team?" or "How can we enhance psychological safety during our meetings?" Participants can type their responses in the poll without revealing their identities. This allows for honest and confidential feedback, which can then be discussed collectively or used to inform future actions.

Key takeaways and next steps

As a product team member or leader, prioritize and actively promote open communication and psychological safety within your team to reduce stress and raise the likelihood of success. This involves creating an environment where team members feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, concerns, and ideas without being judged.

1. Addressing Stress: Recognize and manage microstresses that can accumulate and negatively impact well-being and productivity. Focus on creating a less stressful work environment.

2. Building Psychological Safety: Foster an atmosphere where team members can freely express their ideas, concerns, and mistakes without fear of punishment or humiliation. Encourage open communication and trust within the team.

3. Driving Cultural Change: Start with a committed minority group advocating for a cultural shift. Empower them to create artifacts and define a shared vision for the future. Involve collaborative methods like Design Thinking to drive change effectively.

Encouraging open dialogue and trust is the foundation upon which addressing stress, building psychological safety, and driving cultural change can thrive - and finally get some restful sleep.